building our home. and what i have learned...about myself

 this is what i have been up to for the last year.

(you can read a little background about it on my last post.)

as a daughter of a carpenter and a student of architecture and interior design,

i thought i was well prepared.

i was ready and i knew what to expect.

but as i look back i realized that what really has prepared me for

this adventure, for building our home, is being married to a farmer.

for the last 14 years i have watched him deal with breakdowns, set backs,

drought and floods.  crop prices crashing and wondering if we were going 

to be able to farm the next year.  wondering if he will be able to continue the work he enjoys and that which God has made him for.

and after being worn down dealing with all that, harvest time comes.

he can see the fruits of his labor.

but it's not enough to just sow the crops, water and nurture them.   he has to have the strength to bring them in.

 (our future kitchen)

 harvest time if the busiest time of the year.  it is made up of crazy hours, sacrifices, and faith.

we have seen God bless his work.  sometimes just enough to continue to farm the next year.  sometimes it is a feast.

but one thing i have never seen him do is throw in the towel.  give up.  never saying that it's not worth it.

 (dining room and looking into the living room)

this is embarrassing for my to say but through this adventure, i realized that i give up too easily.

too soon.

if something is harder that i first thought, i stop.  if it's taking too long, i give up.  if it isn't working out like i thought it should, i throw in the towel.  it's not worth the stress, the sacrifices, the hard work to see, whatever it is, to the end.  i not bring in the harvest of my work.  i had believed the lie that whatever God's will was for me, that it would be easy.

i cannot begin to tell you how many times i was ready to give up on this home.  the schedule just went haywire.  we have had many sacrifices, setbacks, emotions that ran wild.

we were beginning to wonder if we misunderstood God.  maybe this wasn't his will for us.  but we keep hearing... keep going.

i believe that it is not a coincidence that our home's final stage is starting just as harvest is starting.

not a coincidence at all.  we are exhausted.  both mentally and physically.  but we can't stop now.  we have to see it to the end.

(my art studio)

so may i offer up a little prayer.  that we will turn to God to give us strength to bring in our harvest.  whatever that may look like for you.  that will we not give up.  that we will be blessed by seeing it through to the end.  then the celebration can begin.

Galatians 6:9 And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.